-facepalm-

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Ugh, so why is it when you see one thing and it devastates you…. then the same person who did that starts to act all sweet and caring again?

PPC can read my mood, even over text message! It’s not like i can tell him what’s upsetting me, because it’s about HIM! This is why I haven’t really set out to like anyone in so long. It makes things awkward, and weird for me. and i act like a stupid girl. I need to stop being a stupid girl.

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wish there was …

wish there was a pill to make it stop

make these feelings stop

why can’t it be easy

like it was when we were young

where you didn’t over analyze

every little thing didn’t carry some hidden meaning

and when it was all over

your broken heart was mended with a band aid

and you went back to playing without missing a beat. 

 

yeah, 

Aside

Well I may have…

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Well I may have mentioned that I like to feel like a princess. Well what princess isn’t looking for her prince charming? I think that every girls prince charming is different. I’m not going to get into it now, but i definitely have my list of qualities.

So I haven’t really been putting myself out there. At least not in the last 2 years.But recently I’ve been presented with an interesting prospect. Let’s call him potential prince charming. I feel like a fool sometimes because it’s seems like I’m way to old to be crushing the way I am. I just feel so happy, and I haven’t felt like this in a long time.

The thing of it is, for anything to truly happen, he kind of has to like you back. I’ve had to many one sided love affairs for my own good. My biggest problem is that I’m so scared to make a fool of myself, that I would rather keep it in inside than try to do anything about it.

PPC is a great guy. I think that it could be something really amazing, if it happens. I’ve just got to be patient. On the plus side we are really good friends.  We talk all the time, almost everyday. Being with him is very natural, it doesn’t feel forced, nor do we have a problem just sitting quietly.

That’s a good sign. If you can’t be with someone, and have a comfortable silence, then you aren’t truly comfortable.

Well for now, just forge on, and see where it takes us.

pretentious?

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so you are probably looking at the title, thinking I am some sort of pretentious girl who thinks she sooo hip trying to be well whatever she’s trying to be….to be honest. I just wanted to share some of the things that go on in my head. Just to put it out there in the universe.

I think that it’s not right to keep things in, and when you run out of people that you feel you can vent to, sans judging, well why not anonymously post it on the world wide web for random strangers to read? Great idea right?

So here it is. I am very girlie. I have always depended on the kindness of strangers, and will never turndown an act of chivalry. But I know many other girls out there also know that there seems to be a severe lack of prince charmings left in the world. So sometimes, we have to do things ourselves. right girls?

Well I hope that you enjoy what you read, feel free to offer advice, it’s always welcome.